Nigerian men in uniform are INSANE!!!
I woke up this morning and prepared myself and my son without an inkling of what was happen to me. I have heard about the insanity of Nigerian men in uniform, I have read about it, I have witnessed it, it has happened to my friends or friends of friends, but this morning I had a first hand taste of the insanity which seems to dodge our men in uniform and I’m convinced that it is a powerful curse that has been placed on them!
There I was on an Okada, and down Awolowo Avenue, Bodija were the men of Road Safety Corps (they should be called the “road hazard corps” I swear) I groaned inwardly and wondered what they wanted.
My Okada rider,who was going on a normal speed slowed down a bit, then out of the blues came this guy, SO Olagunju, (who has obviously been watching too many B grade action movies) he jumped in front of the okada, grabbed its handle bars and threw the okada, the Okada rider and myself, on the road. With the result that the okada rider and I were underneath the machine! (He’s obviously on some kind of drug) We nearly fell into a gutter! I’d never been so furious in my life!
“Are you f*&^%$*& insane? have you f*&^%$*& lost it?”
“Look here madam…” he said, acting surprised
“Don’t you f*&^%$*& madam me, you this f*&^%$*& blazing idiot.”
“Don’t talk to me like that!” He said getting aggressive, he drew near to me and acted like he was going to slap me.
By now the traffic had come to a standstill and some men had gathered, as he drew near to me, they moved closer to him, I swear, they would have beaten that guy up if he had laid a hand on me. I could smell their frustrations, they were willing him to hit me so that they can hit back at him, because at that point he represented the system that has oppressed them for so long … and still is…
Then his superiors who have been watching from afar drew near and started apologizing,
“Don’t f*&^%$*& apologize to me! What if I died? Would you be f*&^%$*& apologizing to me in heaven or hell or wherever?”
“Madam, we’re sorry, please let this Okada rider take you to your office.” But I’d totally lost it, I was screaming and yelling obscenities at them. I insulted every single one of them, I insulted the government that gave them the power to become licensed lawbreakers, I yelled, I screamed, I was egged on by the crowd who were also tired of the bullshit … I am totally freaked out… even rite now …
There I was on an Okada, and down Awolowo Avenue, Bodija were the men of Road Safety Corps (they should be called the “road hazard corps” I swear) I groaned inwardly and wondered what they wanted.
My Okada rider,who was going on a normal speed slowed down a bit, then out of the blues came this guy, SO Olagunju, (who has obviously been watching too many B grade action movies) he jumped in front of the okada, grabbed its handle bars and threw the okada, the Okada rider and myself, on the road. With the result that the okada rider and I were underneath the machine! (He’s obviously on some kind of drug) We nearly fell into a gutter! I’d never been so furious in my life!
“Are you f*&^%$*& insane? have you f*&^%$*& lost it?”
“Look here madam…” he said, acting surprised
“Don’t you f*&^%$*& madam me, you this f*&^%$*& blazing idiot.”
“Don’t talk to me like that!” He said getting aggressive, he drew near to me and acted like he was going to slap me.
By now the traffic had come to a standstill and some men had gathered, as he drew near to me, they moved closer to him, I swear, they would have beaten that guy up if he had laid a hand on me. I could smell their frustrations, they were willing him to hit me so that they can hit back at him, because at that point he represented the system that has oppressed them for so long … and still is…
Then his superiors who have been watching from afar drew near and started apologizing,
“Don’t f*&^%$*& apologize to me! What if I died? Would you be f*&^%$*& apologizing to me in heaven or hell or wherever?”
“Madam, we’re sorry, please let this Okada rider take you to your office.” But I’d totally lost it, I was screaming and yelling obscenities at them. I insulted every single one of them, I insulted the government that gave them the power to become licensed lawbreakers, I yelled, I screamed, I was egged on by the crowd who were also tired of the bullshit … I am totally freaked out… even rite now …
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